

Law of
Electric Blanket Attraction Turn on an electric blanket and a
cat will jump into bed at the speed of light.
Law of Random
Comfort Seeking A cat will always seek, and usually take over,
the most comfortable spot in any given room.
Law of Bag/Box
Occupancy All bags and boxes in a given room must contain a cat
within the earliest possible nanosecond.
Law of Cat
Embarrassment A cat's irritation rises in direct proportion to
her embarrassment times the amount of human laughter.
Law of Milk
Consumption A cat will drink his weight in milk, squared, just
to show you he can.
Law of
Furniture Replacement A cat's desire to scratch furniture is
directly proportional to the cost of the furniture.
Law of Cat
Landing A cat will always land in the softest place possible;
often the midsection of an unsuspecting, reclining human.
Law of Fluid
Displacement A cat immersed in milk will displace her own
volume, minus the amount of milk consumed.
Law of Cat
Disinterest A cat's interest level will vary in inverse
proportion to the amount of effort a human expends in trying to
interest him.
Law of Pill
Rejection Any pill given to a cat has the potential energy to
reach escape velocity.
Law of Cat
Composition A cat is composed of Matter + Antimatter + It
Doesn't Matter.
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