If the devil were to
write his beatitudes, they would probably go something like
1. Blessed are
those who are too tired, too busy, too distracted to spend an hour
once a week with their fellow Christians -- they are my best
2. Blessed are
those Christians who wait to be asked and expect to be thanked --
I can use them.
3. Blessed are
the touchy who stop going to church -- they are my
4. Blessed are
the trouble makers -- they shall be called my
5. Blessed are
the complainers -- I'm all ears to them.
6. Blessed are
those who are bored with the minister's mannerisms and mistakes --
for they get nothing out of his sermons
7. Blessed is
the church member who expects to be invited to his own church --
for he is a part of the problem instead of the
8. Blessed are
those who gossip -- for they shall cause strife and divisions that
9. Blessed are
those who are easily offended -- for they will soon get angry and
10. Blessed are
those who do not give their offering to carry on God's work -- for
they are my helpers.
11. Blessed is
he who professes to love God but hates his brother and sister --
for he shall be with me forever.
12. Blessed are
you who, when you read this think it is about other people and not
yourself -- I've got you too!