You spilled more food on
you than the local soup kitchen
Paramedics bring in the Jaws of Life
to pry you out of
dinner moans are loud enough to signal Dr.
The "Gravy Boat" your wife set out was
a real 14' boat!
The potatoes you used set off
another famine in Ireland.
You get grass stains
on your butt after a walk, but never
Your "Big Elvis Super-Belt" won't
even go around your waist.
You receive a Sumo
Wrestler application in your e-mail.
You set off
3 earthquake seismographs on your morning
Pricking your finger for cholesterol
screening only yielded gravy.
You have 5 TV sets
side-by-side to catch all the football games.
guest quotes a Biblical passage from "The Feeding
That rash on your stomach turns
out to be steering
Your wife wears
a life jacket at night in your water
Representatives from the Butterball Hall of
You consider gluttony
as your patriotic duty.
It looks like the
left-overs are going last until