CHRISTIAN ONE LINERS:

  • Don't let your worries get the best of you - remember, Moses started out as a basket case.
  • Some people are kind, polite, and sweet-spirited until you try to sit in their pews.
  • Many folks want to serve God, but only as advisers.
  • It is easier to preach ten sermons than it is to live one.
  • The good Lord didn't create anything without a purpose, but mosquitoes come close.
  • When you get to your wit's end, you'll find God lives there.
  • People are funny:  They want the front of the bus, the middle of  the road and the back of the church.
  • Opportunity may knock once but temptation leans on the bell.
  • Quit griping about your church; if it was perfect, you couldn't belong.
  • The phrase that is guaranteed to wake up an audience, "And in conclusion."
  • If the church wants a better minister, it only needs to pray for the one it has.
  • God Himself does not propose to judge a man until he is dead so why  should you?
  • To make a long story short - don't tell it.
  • Some minds are like concrete, thoroughly mixed up and permanently set.
  • Peace starts with a smile.
  • I don't know why some people change churches; what difference does it make which one you stay home from?
  • A lot of church members who are singing "Standing on the Promises" are just sitting on the premises.
  • We were called to be witnesses, not lawyers or judges.
  • Outside of traffic, there is nothing that holds this country back as much as committees.
  • Be ye fishers of men.  You catch them - He'll clean them.
  • Coincidence is when God chooses to remain anonymous.
  • Don't put a question mark where God put a period.
  • Don't wait for 6 strong men to take you to church.
  • Forbidden fruits create many jams.
  • God doesn't call the qualified, He qualifies the called.
  • God grades on the cross, not the curve.
  • God loves everyone, but probably prefers "fruits  of the spirit" over "religious nuts!"
  • God promises a safe landing, not a calm passage.
  • He who angers you, controls you!
  • If God is your Copilot - swap seats!
  • Prayer: Don't give God instructions -- just report for duty!
  • The task ahead of us is never as great as the Power behind us.
  • The Will of God will never take you to where the Grace of God will not protect you.
  • We don't change the message, the message changes us.
  • You can tell how big a person is by what it takes to discourage him.
  • The best mathematical equation I have ever seen: 1 cross + 3 nails = 4 given.
  • "Father, bless the person reading this in whatever it is that You know he or she may be needing this day.

 

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