wedding for the first time, a little girl
Whispered to her
mother, "Why is the bride dressed
In white?" "Because white
is the color of happiness,
And today is the happiest day of her
Child thought about this for a moment, then
"So why is the groom wearing black?"
A little girl,
dressed in her Sunday best, was
Running as fast as she could,
trying not to be late
For Bible class. As she ran she
prayed, "Dear Lord,
Please don't let me be late! Dear
Lord, please don't
Let me be late!" While she was running
She tripped on a curb and fell -- getting her
Dirty and tearing her dress. She got up, brushed
Herself off, and started running again. As she ran
once again began to pray, "Dear Lord, please
Don't let me be late
. . . But please don't shove me either!"
boys are in the school yard bragging about their
The first boy says, "My Dad scribbles a few
Words on a
piece of paper -- he calls it a poem; they
The second boy says, "That's nothing. My Dad
A few words on a piece of paper -- he calls it a song;
they give him $100."
The third boy says, "I got you both
beat. My Dad scribbles
A few words on a piece of paper --
he calls it a sermon,
And it takes eight people to collect all
An elderly woman died last month. Having never
She requested no male pallbearers. In her
Instructions for her memorial service, she wrote,
Wouldn't take me out while I was alive -- I don't want
To take me out when I'm dead. ( bitter to the
A police recruit was asked during the
exam, "What would
You do if you had to arrest your own mother?"
"Call for backup."
A Sunday School teacher asked her
class why Joseph
And Mary took Jesus with them to Jerusalem.
Child replied: "They couldn't get a baby
A Sunday school teacher was discussing the
Commandments with her five- and six-year-olds.
Explaining the commandment to "honor thy father
Thy mother," she asked "Is there a commandment that
Teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?"
missing a beat one little boy answered,
"Thou shall not kill."(
School they were teaching how God created
human beings. Little Johnny
Seemed especially intent when
they told him how Eve
Was created out of one of Adam's ribs.
Later in the week
His mother noticed him lying down as
though he were ill,
And said, "Johnny, what is the matter?"
Responded, "I have pain in my side. I
think I'm going to have a wife .
Two boys were walking home from
Sunday school after
Hearing a strong preaching on the devil.
One said to the
Other, "What do you think about all this
The other boy replied, "Well, you know how Santa
Turned out. It's probably just your
Dad." ( What a
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