Great Reasons To Be A
are over in 30 seconds flat.
You know stuff about
A five-day vacation requires only one
You can open all your own jars.
cleaners and hair cutters donít rob you blind.
go to the bathroom without a support group.
have to learn to spell a new last name.
You can leave
the motel bed unmade.
You can kill your own
You get extra credit for the slightest act of
Wedding plans take care of
If someone forgets to invite you to
something, he or she can still be your friend.
underwear is $10 for a three-pack.
If you are 34 and
single, nobody notices.
Everything on your face stays
its original color.
You can quietly enjoy a car ride
from the passengerís seat.
Three pairs of shoes are
more than enough.
You donít have to clean your
apartment if the meter reader is coming.
tell you the truth.
You can quietly watch a game with
your buddy for hours without ever thinking: "He must be mad at
Same workÖmore pay.
Gray hair and wrinkles
only add character.
Wedding dress - $2,000. Tuxedo
rental Ė 75 bucks.
You donít mooch off otherís
You can drop by to see a friend without
having to bring a little gift.
If another guy shows up
at the party in the same outfit, you just might become
You pals can be trusted never to trap
you with. 'So, notice anything different?'
You are not
expected to know the names of more than five
You donít have to stop and think of which way
to turn a nut on a bolt.
You almost never have strap
problems in public.
You are unable to see wrinkles in
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe
You donít have to shave below your
At least a few belches are expected and
Your belly usually hides your big
One wallet and one pair of shoes, one color, all
You can do your nails with a
You have freedom of choice concerning
growing a mustache.
Christmas shopping can be
accomplished for 25 relatives, on December 24th, in 45